Letting Go

Letting go is the hardest thing to do as a parent. Being a parent, I think, is the hardest job on earth. I've had to learn to "let go" of things my whole life. But, letting go of your kids, a little at a time is so difficult. It never gets easier either, it seems to just get harder and harder.

Not only is it heart wrenching, it really makes you reflect on yourself. The beating myself up for not being a good enough parent starts. Questioning myself if I've really prepared my kids for what life is throwing at them, and not only that but I am preparing them for the real world they someday must face?

You don't realize how much your childhood, teenage years are really a part of "getting prepared" for the real world. That someday, your going to have to make these decisions on your own.

So, with all of that said, today was the first day of school. Alex started 4th grade and my baby is officially a kindergartner. I know, a little heavy on the emotions just for the first day of school, but I can't help it.

After I took the kids to school, I came home and the house was so empty, quiet. No babies, no arguing, no get me this, can we do that, "all I do is pick up after you kids all day."

And, sadly, I miss it.

Geez, if I'm this bad now imagine what I'll be like when they go to college.

I love my babies.